Betty White/Jayne Mansfield – a bust

I removed the Betty White/Jayne Mansfield “zombie” comparison yesterday. That match up was done early in the game, before I knew to do many comparisons, and before we became aware of the existence of twins, replicas and all of that. I quickly decided yesterday it had been a mistake based on bust size – Betty and Jayne both posed nude as young women, and Betty was much smaller. Obviously, you’ll have to check that out for yourself.

But it is odd, still.

Jjayne-4ayne Mansfield was born Vera Jayne Palmer, and was a very smart woman, having a reported IQ of 149. She was seen as a competitor to Marilyn Monroe, and so bleached her hair or wore a blond wig and spoke in a whispery Jackie Kennedy-type voice. It was all fake. She supposedly died in 1967 in a car accident in Louisiana, but I doubt that happened. Most of these premature Hollywood deaths, we have found, are fake.

I don’t know why they fake so many deaths. There are only a certain number of slots available for stars, so it could be that Jayne was squeezed out, was seen as not aging well, or wasn’t performing or behaving well.

But there’s another factor – Wikipedia, the ultimate lie factory, tells us that Jayne’s father died of a heart attack at age 32. That too is unlikely, and is a red flag. There’s another business where people routinely fake their deaths, Intelligence. Death at age 32 usually means reassignment to new identity and new post. In addition, Jayne is said to have been born in 1933 – that could be true, as it is just another year, but “33” is also often used as a spook signal.

Movies are not random affairs, and Intelligence is heavily invested in them. Nothing gets out by accident, and some like Zero Dark Thirty and Argo are actually the product of CIA script writers. But beyond that, movie stars often perform dual roles.  Since they are glamorous and travel the globe, they are in a position to meet with leaders in other countries with perfect cover. A woman like Jayne, beautiful and incredibly smart, would be a prized asset, and perhaps even canoodled with foreign dignitaries as part of her job.

Anyway, Vera Jane would be 83 today if still alive.

betty-1Betty White is a horse of a different color, but she too has red flags all about her. Said to have been born in 1922, she would be 94 if that were actually true. She is younger than that. She’s been around our television sets longer than I’ve been alive, and played some forging roles, for instance, Sue Ann Nivens on the Mary Tyler Moore Show, a horny middle-aged woman. She then moved on to Golden Girls, playing Rose Nylind, a terminally naive and sexually active woman in her fifties. Never watched that show. If Betty has an Intel role, it would be to push forward with destructive norms, advancing family breakdown and redefining male/female relations. Aggressive women tend to emasculate the men around them, and lord knows men these days, growing breasts and popping Viagra and going metrosexual – half of whom are gay on TV, are not what they were fifty years ago.

The curious thing is that these two women strongly resembled one another, so much so I mistakenly thought that one woman played both characters. After all, veneers and a wig was all it took to change Betty into Jayne. But while they can increase bust size, they cannot enlarge and reduce on demand, so that was the final arbiter.(The facial alignment is not quite correct to boot.)

While they are different people, they could easily be twins, which is why I think White is 83 and not 94, and why she is still so energetic. I won’t bother with face chops and all of that, as the pictures above, once you remove Jayne’s wig and veneers and smarten her up, show two very similar women.

They are just entertainers, and this is not an earth shattering moment for me. But the lies being told about them – Jayne’s fake death and Betty’s age and a possible familial relationship – speak of Intel connection for both, not at all unusual in the film business. Think … Angelina Jolie, who has played a spook in some movies, and most likely is a spook in real life. And think of Brad Pitt, her beard.

About Mark Tokarski

Just a man who likes to read, argue, and occasionally be surprised.
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