Thanks to Covid, I Believe in Science

By Guest Writer Scott RC

Over the past year and a half, as I argued with friends and family about the absurdities of the Covid narrative, many of them speculated my objections must stem from a lack of belief in science.

I now realize how right they were. I was a heathen. I didn’t believe.

But recently, I made a discovery… and the scales fell from my eyes.

Like others who follow this blog, I’ve read lots of the scientific studies media and government officials point to when claiming “science supports” whatever they say about Covid. We know these papers prove nothing. They offer no credible evidence. Many are not, and never will be, published in established scientific journals. Yet their mere existence confers the blessing of scientific “support.”

As long as the authors use impenetrable language to describe scientific-sounding work on a hypothesis… and as long as the media likes that hypothesis… voilà! Lo-and-behold, science supports it!

At that point, the hypothesis emerges from the cocoon of imagination, spreads its wings, and manifests into glorious reality.

Come to think of it, it’s a lot like the Law of Attraction—a concept I’m embarrassed to admit I once believed in.

Man, was I stupid. The Law of Attraction never supported any of my hopes and dreams. Not a single one.

But yesterday, I took one of my most seemingly impossible, completely ridiculous fantasies, and I offered it up to science.

Guess what.

Science supports it!

Well, I mean, it will support it. Soon. Probably. I just need to get the media to say it does. I’m no trillionaire, so most of the “trusted” news sources will probably ignore my scientific paper. But the hypothesis is so sensational—so clickbait-worthy—and news outlets are so delightfully flexible about facts that I’m pretty sure at least one of them will pick it up. And once that happens, social media will definitely take notice.

For most of my life, my science-denying views have made me a pariah. A social outcast. A total loser. But it looks like that’s about to change.

Hey, I’m going to miss you all. Please know that, as I make the rounds of talk shows and negotiate lucrative book and movie deals, I’ll think back fondly, and often, on all the good times we used to have. Conspiracy theory’s been fun—it really has—but, you’ve got to admit, not believing anything gets to be a drag after a while.

Now—praise be to Fauci!—I BELIEVE! I BELIEVE!!!


APPENDIX

POM UNIVERSITY

Department of Navel, Genitalia and Perineum Studies

Comparative study of Hypothetically largest human Phallus in the world with representative samples from u.s. males using computer modeling and mathematical analysis

R.C. Scott

 

BACKGROUND

The human phallus comes in many sizes, and these sizes may be measured and quantified in a variety of ways. Phallus size is most commonly described in terms of length. In cases where length is determined to be suboptimal, circumference is often used. However, phallus size may also be assessed according to volume, mass, density, and elasticity. Elasticity measurements are especially useful, as they allow scientists to calculate sexualmaxi resonance for cannona (srC) in cases where expansion capabilities may not have been fully realized under direct observation. The Griesidic formula incorporates all of these measurements and provides the greatest degree of accuracy; however, many scientists are content to use nothing more than length and/or circumference when conducting comparative studies. This state of affairs has led to controversy among academics over the hypothesis that the phallus of the author, a 51-year-old Caucasian male, is the largest in the world. Due to the challenges of obtaining accurate data on the phalli of living human males across all geographical areas of Earth (which, for the purpose of this study, is defined as “the world”), we limited our investigation to the overall size of the author’s phallus relative to the estimated phallus sizes of representative samples of males residing, or believed to reside, in the United States, using photographs and video stills selected from an array of sources over the course of an exhaustive Internet search.

 

METHODS

Measurements of the author’s phallus were taken at three separate times (morning, afternoon, and evening) over the course of one day. Various forms of primarily visual stimuli, derived from digital and print sources, were used to actuate a comprehensive range of tumescence levels. Photographic images of the tumescent phalli of men throughout the United States were then collected from a variety of websites and social media accounts. Though every effort was made to include representative samples for all demographics, poor lighting, selective framing, and unreliable self-reporting often prevented authoritative determinations of race, age, income level, and body weight. Men between the ages of (presumably) 18 to (definitively) 75 were represented in 1,947 samples. Men older than 75 were excluded due to the difficulty of obtaining reliable photographic samples. The selected images were then entered into the Buttafuchs 3-D digital modeling system, and the appropriate measurements were made.

 

RESULTS

Measurement data from the author’s phallus and the representative computer model samples was assessed using the Griesidic formula:

SRC=:

 

The author’s phallus was assigned an overall size value of 81.11911 ± 1.01801 srR. The largest phallus from the computer model samples was determined to be 80.99999 ± 4.98989 srC.

DISCUSSION

Further study is warranted, but at this time, our results strongly suggest that the author might have the largest human phallus in the United States. In the event that no human males located in other countries or geographical regions are found to have larger phalli, the author’s phallus then may be tentatively postulated as being the largest on Earth (i.e., the world).

37 thoughts on “Thanks to Covid, I Believe in Science

  1. This reminds me of the epidemic of fake diseases in previous years like cancer. You had the same things going on with cancer tests and cancer research. I’m surprised they haven’t forced people to wear masks because of this boogeyman ailment.

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      1. This was released a decade after the Spanish Flu hoaxdemic came to an end. The more things change, the more they stay the same.

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  2. I’ve come full circle, everyone.

    I’m now a huge proponent of Rudolf Steiner and his skool..I now “believe”.

    I was watering my bushes with the garden hose here in heat-stricken Utah.

    I swear to God and Joseph Smith I saw a garden gnome! He even said “Hello Rastus!” to me!

    He then vanished. But I could be mistaken, it may have been a tranny.

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  3. I have a few questions to my fellow Americans: Is it real with Trump coming back? Is it true, that you don’t have to wear masks anymore? Are there any corona trials going on in the USA? In Germany we still have to wear masks in public, which is good, because it will make more people seeing through it. The majority still takes it for real of course. It’s easier to fool one than to un-fool him. I keep looking for signs that TPTB are losing this battle. But did they ever lose one? It seems to me, that the end of corona is as scripted as the entire show. Our media mentioned ONCE that the PCR test is not working. They mentioned ONCE that the US-election is being recounted. Other than that they keep spreading corona fear and people keep buiyng it. For now!

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    1. “It seems to me, that the end of corona is as scripted as the entire show.”

      The end of corona? This is not going to end, it’s going to get worse. The light at the end of the tunnel is an oncoming train.

      The “delta variant” is gaining momentum. Sydney is in full lockdown again, Brits are not allowed to travel to Germany and in the Netherlands there is talk of local measurements because this variant is gaining ground.

      The Covid religion is here to stay and its worse than Islam, Christianity, Judaism and Nazism combined.

      If you want to know your future I suggest you read “The Spars Pandemic 2025 – 2028” from the The Johns Hopkins Center for Health Security. It’s a fictitious scenario of course just like Event 201…

      Click to access spars-pandemic-scenario.pdf

      And don’t forget the coming world wide famine due to hacks and “climate change”. I urge you to visit the Ice Age Farmer channel on YouTube regularly before its taken down. Food production and logistics are being sabotaged worldwide, the effects of which are at your door.

      We are going to see tyranny like we have never seen before.

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    2. Forgot to mention: the “delta variant” is supposed to be 70% more contagious.

      Every vaxxed person who still gets Covid (-19,20,21?) is more likely to die from it than a non vaxxed person. This is going to explain the coming vax-deaths.

      Not only sterilising but also culling the herd is the objective.

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      1. Something that doesn’t exist cannot be “70% more contagious” – they just make this shit up to sound authoritative. A “variant” or “mutation” is either just an invention, or a product of alignment, where a computer program fills in the missing 99% of a “virus” genome. Of course different programs produce different variants. People might die from the vaccines, but not from any virus. They will, however, blame vaccine deaths on viruses.

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        1. I wrote “supposed to be” for a reason. My comment is on the continuation of the hoax and the lies they use and how they are going to blame a non existing mutation for the vaccine deaths.

          The 70% more contagious virus (I know it does not exist, please don’t insult my intellect again) is going to call for more drastic measures then we have seen before and an excuse for the vaccines not working.

          In spite of what a lot of commenters seem to think, the corona hoax is far from over is the basic message of my comment.

          Mark, you are starting to show a tendency of not getting my comments, this is not the first time. How come?

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      2. I agree XS, and the variant is also the reason the vaxxed will need a booster(s).

        The Guardian had a comical bar graph – vaxxed were supposedly less likely than unvaxxed to get delta infected – but they were about equally likely to DIE of it. “Breakthrough” infections they call it.

        Strikes me as typical elite trolling – “get vaxxed for 95% protection!” and then “oops… You’re still 50/50 with the unvaxxed to die of delta. So ya gotta get the booster…”

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    3. I only wear the mask while shopping groceries in Aldi. Don’t want to scare the cashier girls. If you don’t participate in public events, just live within your own, taking walks, etc. you won’t notice much. The weather is great, everything is green, life is good. In general. I don’t really follow the news knowing it’s bullshit. What I see is a slow change in perspective. There are more people knowing it’s not real. Supposedly 30% of Germans don’t believe in Virus anymore. That’s great. 10 years ago it was 30 Germans. Myself included. TPTB are losing countenance now. It looks like the leadership is already gone but the generals still follow the last order. It’s beyond my mind that the leaders can be as retarded as Joe Joe or our German Bärbock (from our Green party, supposedly running for chancellor) and yet still people will take it for real. I’m still convinced the end of corona will come soon and in a way nobody will noticed it. As nobody noticed Aids is over, Taliban is gone, etc.

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      1. I don’t even carry a mask with me anymore, but when I did, it had on it in bold letters the word “SHEEP”. I cut a slit across the bottom of the letters and above a smaller one so I could breathe. Only one guy at the gym ever noticed the slit, and he smiled and gave me a thumbs up. Most people are not looking at faces anyway, and if they do look at the mask are put off by the word “SHEEP” and don’t notice the slit.

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      2. According to the most recent mainstream media reports, the Taliban is rapidly taking over Afghanistan.

        Reports about AIDS and the fight against it also appear regularly in the media.

        Don’t get me wrong, I attach little value to these reports but the AIDS hoax is certainly not over and the Taliban, who ever they really are, has far from disappeared.

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        1. there recently (on 25-th of June) was an event in the German city of Würzburg, where a Muslim refugee supposedly attacked people with a knife and killed a couple of women, there is a Wikipedia page already, the usual stuff. On 26-th of June in Vienna (Austria) Muslim refugees supposedly drugged, raped and killed a 13 year old girl, also the usual stuff. And guess what? All the corona critics, bloggers, critical politicians, you name it, immediately switched their focus from Corona to deportation of Muslim refugees. This bad Muslims obviously just waited for corona to end to start their attacks against non believers. It wouldn’t surprise me if wearing a mask will soon be forbidden again due to this attacks.

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    4. Barb- CDC did a sudden about face, virtually declaring victory through the vaccine (only bemoaning the stalling out vax numbers) and basically giving license to the vaxxed to unmask. And nobody at this point asks, so many unvaxxed dropped the mask too. Far fewer masks in use where I am (blue dot in red state.)

      But as per XS, it’s likely a trick, where this policy will in future be derided as a horrible mistake, and Delta or other will be rationale to end the temporary reprieve.

      WHO is critical of CDC over their laxity I think. It’s just a custom op on US public, I’m guessing.

      Trump is Trump, and could be gearing up for his umpteenth act in public life, who knows…

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      1. TIMR, Trump is an actor of course but he represents a certain part of TPTB. Geopolitically all the power comes from Vatican (concordat) which still considers the entire world as its property. The City (of London) and Washington together with Vatican are even called the three Vaticans. Why else all the VIPs are so eager to visit the Pope, fall on their knees and kiss his hand, no matter who the pope then actually is? It is to demonstrate their submissiveness to the center of actual power. Trump did that and Biden too. It is just now that they just shake hand. It’s symbolic of course and not connected to the person who plays the Pope. Vatican controls the world. Period. From time to time there is one who tries to become independent. Napoleon tried that, Adolf tried that too. They both lost. It now seems to me that Putin’s Russia somehow became independent and that this was not part of the original plan. It took him 20 years to create it from the ruins left by Jelzin but now Russia is a real world power and will certainly be used to create a balance of force within the NWO. Our Merkel (of course not the person but the forces behind it, based in Jerusalem by the way) tried hard to create a powerful EU and failed. The Brits lost the WW2 and became meaningless. They all play a game and we are but the chess pawns in it. Just watch them having fun when they meet, for instance on the last G7 meeting in Cornwall. The Corona hoax is a sort of cleaning the chess board and restart the game. That’s the real meaning of the great reset. IMO.

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        1. “Geopolitically all the power comes from Vatican (concordat) which still considers the entire world as its property.”

          Or rather the people running the Vatican. The Holy See itself is just a front for the real power elite, just like the White House in D.C., and not solely the root cause of everything that’s happening in this world, although it does play a part in the scheme of things.

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  4. Barb,

    You should not be proud of public wearing a mask! It’s a mark of mass ignorance and shame 😦

    No masks here in Utah, and shops (such as my local coffee shop) have removed all plexiglass barriers and even allow one to pour their own cream from a flask on the counter..where heaven forbid many hands touch throughout the day.

    I can’t believe it!!

    Ausgezeichnicht!!! 🙂

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    1. That’s what I expected to hear. I mean the masks and other measures. It’s like the Germans have to play a special role in the show. The media don’t tell us the masks are gone everywhere except Germany. It’s “ausgezeichnet” by the way, but never mind.

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        1. no, it’s a fake. They do what I remember from the Eastern Germany. The police, which are regular people with at least average education, are not able to beat up people. So they hire special forces, give them batons and they do their job if necessary. But not in peoples homes. On demonstrations when they fear it could go out of control. Or when they want to make a show. I avoid public events in general but have been in some when meeting friends, even in two demonstrations in Frankfurt and all went well. In Berlin, where Merkel keeps her court, it supposedly is a bit different, but I can’t confirm that. Germans in general prefer to follow the rules and have their peace. Even the critical ones. So there usually is really nothing to see. What you see in the media is fake and what really happens you won’t see. I still don’t know anybody who died due to the vaccine. many friends got some pain in muscles or got sick for a day or two, nothing unusual. It’s the act of the jab, which makes people sick. I don’t think the corona jab is different. Nobody knows what’s in it, right? Only the producers and they don’t have to declare the contents. Some now even try to re-engineer the contents but this is hopeless IMO.

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  5. Excuse our belly-flop, folks. The blog post was supposed to hyperlink to a PDF of the “scientific study” on a separate web page. The formatting for the “study” got screwed up when Mark added it as an Addendum. Embarrassing, but this post will soon fall down the blog roll, out of sight and out of mind. Future attempts at humor will be far less complicated.

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  6. In Italy no more mandatory masks in public since yesterday, which it’s bullshit of course, as masks in public were never mandatory here, unless you couldn’t avoid the crowd.
    I’ve never worn one.
    So the government pretended to remove something which has always been on a voluntary base, and that’s because italian people are amongst the stupidest individuals on Earth, besides ignorant. If they’d read the restriction orders in place until yesterday they would have known that, but I guess it would have made no difference at all, as they still wear masks in public today, even when alone in the car on on the street and will continue to do so as the BS Delta variant scares them shitless.

    And in order to convince (or better force) people like me to get the shot, italian scientists are saying that masks indoors will be removed only when 3 italians out of 4 will get vaxxed. They can go f***k themselves any time as far as I’m concerned.
    But I’m sure 110% that most italians who still have doubts will get vaxxed soon as they think they’ll no longer be able to even enter a supermarket without showing what it’s called a “green pass” here, out of crass stupidity and ignorance again.

    I’m not gonna lie, I don’t care It they die in order of thousands a day from September on, I’m tired with living among idiots without a single working neuron.

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    1. The sheer and utter joy I receive when hearing a woman speak this way takes my breath away. 🙂

      Please don’t change one bit!

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  7. Wonderful I’ve long believed ScottRC is Fauxlex, among others. I mean just look at all the new posters on this inaugural ScottRC thread. Fauxlex always loved commenting with himself.

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    1. I have communicated privately with Scott, and unless he is schitzo, he is not Faux, who at one time deleted SRC’s comments and wanted him banned. Faux was angry and suspicious, Scott is not. I can be fooled, but this is too clever by half.

      Liked by 1 person

    2. Wow, thanks, Ron! Since this post didn’t come off the way I’d hoped (due to technical difficulties and miscommunication with Mark), I was relieved to see that most of the comments had little or nothing to do with it or me. But I must admit, it was nice to see myself get a mention at my “inauguration.” 🙂

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  8. Ron, I’d never heard of Failfandom Anon before, but after a quick search, I’m certainly intrigued. If I decide to transition into a career within this community, I will seek you out. Anyone who puts as much thought as you have into the anonymous nobody commenters of a blog hardly anybody reads must be a stalwart among them.

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  9. Guys, the italian ms media these days are reporting the news that in Canada, more precisely in the Vancouver area over 130 people have died due to the highest temperatures ever recorded there, 49,5 degrees Celsius, can any of you confirm this?
    Cos I don’t believe that for a second, I actually smell BS big time.
    To me, it sounds like they’re trying to cover up deaths by vaccine, which makes them so very stupid as anyone with a brain and a weather forecast app in their smartphone has already checked that out and found that the temperatures in that area are very far from 50 degrees, 25 degrees Celsius today more like.

    But again, I could be wrong so thanks for confirming or debunking this.

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    1. Vancouver area over 130 people have died due to the highest temperatures ever recorded there, 49,5 degrees Celsius

      130 more than the normal rate ? With such extreme temps that seems like few even, for an area where the daily rate is, what?

      Don’t fall into the fakeo fallacy, the trap into thinking that things must be fake just because the media report something. Or covering for something else (with these xtreme temps that is not really needed eh, but the poisoned dart rape must play a malignant rather than beneficial role ofcourse).

      The media show their staged prop sets of in the background real events where real people die. If you detach from the Clownshow, you start seeing it more sharply.

      I’d stay away from Canada, it should be NPC in your wondering world, and focus on bella euro champions Italia; your ecos nomos and aDORE.

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